From 'Dian Zhi' to 'Xiang Fu': Deciphering the First Lesson of an Ancient Bride

1. Early Morning Preparations (Morning Prep) Bathing and Attire: On the morning of her first day as a married woman (before sunrise), the bride must rise early, bathe, and don formal attire. Preparing the Gifts: The bride must personally present '笲' (a bamboo container) filled with meeting gifts. For the father-in-law, it's fixed as red dates and chestnuts (symbolizing waking early and being cautious); for the mother-in-law, it's dried shredded meat (symbolizing obedience to teachings). 2. Formal Introduction (Formal Greeting) In-laws Take Seats: The father-in-law sits in the honored position on the east side (facing west), and the mother-in-law sits on the west side (facing east). Performing Rites and Offering Gifts: The bride ascends from the lower position (west steps). She first bows to her father-in-law, placing the dates and chestnuts before his mat. Then, she bows to her mother-in-law, presenting the dried shredded meat. Both parents-in-law must return the bow. 3. Washing and Serving Meals (Filial Duty and Service) Personal Service: After the greeting, the bride must wash her hands (purification) and personally bring specially prepared meals like dates, chestnuts, and minced meat to her parents-in-law (this is the precursor to modern tea ceremonies), serving them while they eat. 4. 'Jiu Gu Xiang Fu' (Completion of Adulthood Rites) • Bestowal of Food and Acceptance: After the parents-in-law finish their meal, they bestow the remaining food upon the bride to eat (anciently called 'Xiang Fu'), symbolizing the merging of the two families' bloodlines. • The First Toast: Finally, the father-in-law toasts the bride, and the mother-in-law presents her with silk, jewelry, or land, along with family teachings. At this point, the bride officially gains membership in her husband's family clan.