The Ability to Despair

It's certainly painful. It's better not to despair, but... Being able to struggle, to feel pain and frustration and struggle, is proof of life. It's proof that you have the strength to fight your way out of despair. Living with despair requires immense energy. It's proof that you still have that strength. That alone is amazing. I know this because I once fell from despair into complete 'disappointment,' to a place where even despair had burned out. Being able to despair isn't entirely a bad thing. So, sometimes, even while struggling through pain, praise yourself for being 'alive'. That said... Nobody wants to stay in pain forever, right? I don't want to return to a white, soft, quiet, and gentle world with nothing in it on my own, but it's a little scary that I sometimes still feel like I'm about to fall into it when my strength runs out. Well, with Bosuki around, nothing serious is likely to happen, though.