Self-Love

The Buddha once encountered this situation: One day, the king came before the Buddha to listen to the Dharma and began practicing Vipassanā. Usually, if one person in a household starts learning, the Dharma gradually influences others in the family. Since the king was the head of the household and the ruler of the country, his influence was naturally great, and everyone in the household began practicing this method. Queen Marie also became a good practitioner. They often meditated together in the same meditation room in the royal palace. One day, after an hour of meditation, the king asked the queen, "If someone were to ask you, 'Who is the person you love the most?' what would you answer?" She replied, "The same question arose in my mind during meditation. I realized that, in truth, I love no one but myself." The king laughed and said, "Excellent! I had the same question and the same answer." So, they went together to see the Buddha to report this. The Buddha said, "Well said! Well said!" This is the first step in walking out of suffering. When a person discovers the crux of the problem, they can step out of and resolve the issue; otherwise, they live in imagination their entire life. "I love my son, I love my wife, I love my husband, I love this, I love that." In reality, you love no one; you only love yourself—your desires, hopes, and dreams. You love a person because you expect them to fulfill your ideals. Once their behavior or attitude goes against what you want, all love disappears. Therefore, you are not loving others, but yourself. Recognizing this point makes it easy to eliminate selfish thoughts and to break free from self-centered habits.