不登校なんよ

Both of my children were homeschooled: my elder child from 3rd grade elementary to 3rd grade middle school, and my younger child for all three years of middle school. Now they are adults and working. My elder child dropped out of high school after one month, and my younger child did not attend high school at all. As a father, I could only watch over them. The two children had a younger brother with autism. The child with autism had his own ways and wouldn't listen. My wife and I somehow managed to raise three children, but the child with autism ran out of the house one night and died in a traffic accident. About half a year after that, my elder child stopped going to school. Recently, when I asked my elder child why they stopped going to school, they said their homeroom teacher said unpleasant things to them. They don't remember what was said. My younger child stopped going to school because classmates said unpleasant things to them. I thought it was understandable that both of them couldn't go to school because of what happened with their brother.

I've been homeschooled due to tests and friend issues. It's been like this for about 2 years since around 5th grade, but now I can go about twice a week. Let's encourage each other!

I'm an adult who used to refuse to go to school. I used to attend school so much in elementary school that I could aim for a perfect attendance award, but I started refusing to go to school in middle school. The reason, simply put, was human relationships. The homeroom teacher took a long-term leave, and during that time, a substitute teacher told me, "It's your fault that the homeroom teacher is on long-term leave." This made me distrustful of people, and I couldn't eat at school. I could eat at home, so my family didn't understand and often scolded me, saying, "Why can't you do it normally?" I was the youngest of three siblings, and my older two were excellent students. At the time, the term "school refusal" was just starting to emerge. My second-year homeroom teacher visited my home diligently, but I couldn't trust him because of what the substitute teacher had said. I could only manage to attend school from the nurse's office, and even then, I would quickly feel unwell and leave early. Around the latter half of my second year, a counseling room was established, and if parents applied, students could attend the counseling room or participate in classes. However, due to my ignorance, I didn't understand and worried, "Why can't I go to the counseling room?" Consulting with the school counselor also required a parental application. It seems strange looking back now.

To be more specific, I'm currently on medical leave at home due to depression and other mental health conditions. It's been about 5 years now...? I was diagnosed with being on the autism spectrum and having a borderline intellectual functioning later in adulthood. I often think 'If only I had known sooner...'. I've always tried to keep up with 'normal' people, and I'm confident I've put in tens or hundreds of times the effort, yet throughout my school and work life, I was constantly told, 'When are you going to get serious?'. I wasn't slacking off, and I wasn't being lazy. I was doing it more earnestly than anyone else. But I wasn't understood. In the end, you're the only one who can protect yourself, and you're the only one who can truly understand yourself, so don't get hurt by someone's careless words.

No negative comments on seeking advice, please. For some reason, I've been bullied a lot since I was young. Almost everyone in my class bullied me (there was only one class per grade, so it was quite a lot), and being bad-mouthed was an everyday occurrence. The reason they specifically bad-mouthed me was because it was planned for me to get angry from their deliberate taunts (I was young, like 1st grade, and didn't know how to handle it), and then they would report me to the teacher for acting out, making me the bad guy every time. When the teacher said, "Come to the staff room!!", I refused, saying "No!!". Then they said, "Go down the stairs!!", and I refused again, saying "No!!". They then threatened, "Then I'll force you down." I ended up tumbling down the stairs not just sitting down, but with a hard impact that left bruises on my backside... This continued almost every day for about 6 years (I was finally able to transfer in May of my 6th year), and for some reason, I was always made out to be the bad one, always scolded, and I didn't understand what was happening, leading to tears almost every day. I don't get angry anymore, but I can't shake the feeling that the people who bullied me back then are still bad-mouthing me. Please, look at me now. You can tell how much I hated school; even though my parents told me to go, there were days I cried in the morning and begged to stay home.

Since I'm a high school senior, I had a career counseling session around July. But you won't believe what happened. I was told some truly awful things. When I mentioned the faculty I wanted to go to, they scoffed and said, "It'll probably take you 2-3 years to even get close (lol)", "How are you going to go to college if you can't even come to school? ww", "Your grades aren't improving because you're not attending in-person classes, right?" It was relentless. They recommended faculties I had no interest in, and none of the universities they gave me had the major I wanted. I understand what the school is trying to say. It's true I haven't been attending school, but it's not that I dislike school itself, I just dislike public transportation. That's why I want to live alone in college. I also get wanting to play it safe by lowering the rank of the faculty I aim for. But I've been saying since I enrolled that I want to challenge myself. Right after the meeting, for the following week, I was depressed and couldn't stop crying or eating. I didn't want to sleep, I didn't want to be awake, I didn't want to eat, I didn't want to think. As I mentioned in my previous post, I have a medical condition, so not being able to eat is a serious problem, so I went to three different hospitals. I was on the verge of hospitalization. If you ruin your health before your exams, no matter how much you lower your expectations, you won't be able to take them...

I'm a high school senior who's been truant since middle school. I have a few illnesses and was hospitalized for about a year in middle school. After that, I couldn't catch up with the entrance exams and ended up going to a correspondence high school. Right after being discharged, I was able to go to school (middle school) every day, but since starting high school, public transportation has been really difficult, and I've barely been able to go. Until last year, I had home nursing visits, and often ended up at the general hospital after going for IV infusions at night. I almost had to be hospitalized a few times, and there was a period where I couldn't eat and was bedridden. However, the school, perhaps being overly optimistic or ignorant, keeps suggesting I attend more classes in person, saying things like 'Why don't you try coming to school a bit more?'. Like, if I could go, I wouldn't have chosen correspondence school, you know? And after the argument with the school regarding my career counseling, I haven't been back once. What even is correspondence school... (I'll post again later because I want to talk about the career counseling issue too.)

I'm already an adult and working, but is it okay to post here?:;(∩´﹏`∩); I might not be able to solve everything, but I joined because I thought I could listen to your rants or offer some minor advice. I was a school refuser from elementary school all the way through high school. I was ostracized just for having different sensibilities from others, and even though I had friends, I felt like I didn't belong, which led me to stop going to school. I was criticized at home and at school, and there were times when I felt like I was going crazy, sensing that even just walking outside made others judge me. There was a period when I was a shut-in, but from the story of a certain game, I received messages like "Everyone is crazy, so it's wrong to blame only yourself" and "Broaden your horizons." This helped me recover mentally to the point where I could work and tell myself it was okay to be alive. Now that I've been a working adult for a few years, I realize that school is quite an "abnormal environment," isn't it? They often say school is a microcosm of society, but after starting work, I found it much more manageable than school. There are terrible people, but there are also good people. As an adult, you can choose your own place to belong, and there are many ways to escape.

Since I joined, I thought I'd give an update on my situation. It's been about four years since I developed severe depression due to stress. I didn't want to take medication, so I've been dragging it out and haven't been able to attend school properly in middle school. Recently, I've finally been able to wake up in the morning, and I'm setting a goal to wake up in the morning so I can go to a free school, even if I don't go to regular school. I was anxious about the entrance exams, but I heard there are correspondence schools that you can enter without exams, which eased my worries a bit, thinking "I might be able to get a diploma..." Please take care of me.

In the latter half of my second year of middle school, my autonomic nervous system got messed up, I had no motivation, and I often cried at night. I frequently took days off because I didn't want to go. I managed to return, but after summer vacation ended, I started thinking again that I didn't want to go. When I told my parents I wanted to take a break, they got in a bad mood and yelled at me, which made me want to go even less. I want to study for my exams, but nothing is going into my head. Did I get into the habit of taking too many breaks?